Kiss and Tell

By Lauren Pritchard-Gordon

There’s no doubt about it, kissing is definitely an art form. While some people consider it to be the forerunner to sex, others believe it to be better than sex!

There are many different ways of kissing, ranging from the tame, first date peck on the cheek, to the electric kissing technique employed when two people are slightly better acquainted!

Whatever the case may be, you’re equipped with the tools for planting the perfect kiss on your date, and, we’re going to give you some helpful hints you might wish to consider when indulging in the delights of kissing.

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Personal taste
When it comes to kissing, everyone has their own preferences as to which technique(s) they enjoy. It’s important to remember that a strategy which worked with a previous partner, won’t necessarily appeal to a new date. The best idea is to take your time and experiment to find out what works for you as a couple. Remember to pay attention to body language and breathing which both provide great clues as to whether or not your kisses are having the desired effect.

Timing
Like so many things in life, timing plays a key part when it comes to successful kissing. On a first date, a small peck on the cheek at the start of the date is usually acceptable, but don’t expect anything more until the end of the date, when, (provided the date has gone well) you may wish to give your date another peck on the cheek, or a kiss on the lips (though the latter is deemed by some people as being too much for a first date). Don’t be over-eager on your first date, and lunge at your dinner date between the starter and the main course! Even holding hands straight away is usually a little too forward. So take your time and remember to read your date’s body language.

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Hands
During a kiss, it can be hard to know where to put your hands. It will depend on the nature of the kiss and how well you know the person you’re kissing! In the case of a first date, avoid the temptation to let your hands explore the obvious places (i.e. bum, thighs, and so on)! Some people choose to gentle hold the other person’s face during the kiss, alternatively, you could lightly place your hands on your date’s hips or shoulders.

Neck and ears
As one of the erogenous zones, the neck is a great place to kiss (though probably not on a first date!) The ears are a trickier case, so we think it’s worth taking a bit of time to look at this area. If you enjoy letting your lips explore the ears of your partner, you’ll have to remember that not everyone likes having their ears kissed, so if someone pulls away, don’t push the issue further. Generally, when it comes to ears, the key thing to remember is to use your tongue sparingly, and definitely avoid sticking it directly into the ear hole – not nice! Instead, kiss, nibble and gently lick the outside of the ear and, of course, the lobe.

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The knock-back
If your date pulls away from a kiss, don’t keep lunging at them in the hopes they’ll change their mind! Similarly, don’t start ranting at them like a child who’s had their sweets snatched away! Remember to stay dignified, and accept the fact that they didn’t want a kiss. It may not be the case that they never want to kiss you; they may simply think that it’s too soon, particularly if it’s only your first date. So keep you head held high, because they’re the one who’ll be missing out anyway!

Breath
It is vital to make sure that your breath, mouth and lips are ready for a kiss. This is easily achieved by regularly brushing your teeth and tongue as part of your daily routine. When out on a date, make sure you take some mints with you to freshen your breath, particularly if you’ve both had a meal. The best time to eat a mint is after the coffee as this is the usual way to end a meal anyway; so eating a mint at this time (and offering your date one so as not to seem rude) won’t necessarily make your date think that you want a kiss.

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“So Kiss Me”: The kiss itself…

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Shy and gentle
When you find your lips meeting with your date’s lips for the first time, the coy approach is ideal. This type of kiss is more about the lips than the tongue. Relax your lips, and open your mouth slightly (remember that you’re not in the dentist’s chair!); tilt your head (so as to avoid bumping noses!); then gently let your lips touch and move with the other person’s. Remember to breathe through your nose (or mouth, if your nose is blocked!) and don’t let the kiss go on for too long. Instead, draw back slightly so that your partner is left wanting more. If their lips remain parted and they’re still leaning in, let you lips go back to meet theirs’, and continue kissing, possibly alternating between kissing the upper and lower lip, as well as both lips together.

Slow and sensual
Women in particular tend to enjoy the slow and sensual approach to kissing. This is similar to the aforementioned method, but involves the tongue. It’s best to start off with the shy and gentle approach and gradually introduce your tongue into the equation. Avoid the temptation to speed the kiss up because the key factor is the slow pace. When kissing the lips, gently move your tongue through the lips, just a little at first, and alternate between using your tongue and your lips to explore the other person’s lips. Slowly build up the amount of tongue you use in the kiss, remembering to use the muscles in your tongue and avoid letting it go too relaxed otherwise you may end up kissing more like a thirsty dog than Casanova!

Passionate and intense
When you’re well acquainted with your partner (or if your first date is very eager!) then it’s time to graduate to the passionate, intense kiss. The tongue is the star of this kiss, but that’s not to say you’re allowed to slobber like a deranged St. Bernard puppy! Build this kiss up for maximum effect, then the sky’s the limit! Let your tongue explore your partner’s lips, tongue, teeth and mouth. You might like to try stroking the roof of your partner’s mouth with your tongue; nibbling and sucking their upper and particularly their lower lip; swirling your tongue over their tongue; and pressing your lips together with more force. Passionate kissing can be fast or slow, so experiment to find out which speed suits you both.

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